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Movie Review: 'The Cat in the Hat' ridiculously builds the stakes so high, the universe could die

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Movie Review: 'The Cat in the Hat' ridiculously builds the stakes so high, the universe could die
ENT

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Movie Review: 'The Cat in the Hat' ridiculously builds the stakes so high, the universe could die

2026-11-04 01:01 Last Updated At:01:11

The folks behind the new animated “The Cat in the Hat” are pretty confident they've got the cat in the bag. It hasn't even opened yet and there are onscreen references to possible movie spinoffs for the jet-powered magical couch and The Things. As the credits roll, the titular feline even gets into the act: “Let's go sequel!”

He's probably right about that, though — an inevitable franchise born on the back of whimsical, beloved IP that now gets the Marvel Cinematic Universe treatment: Put the fate of the world in the balance, insert a horrific enemy and add lots of things — in this case dozens of Things — until we just want it to end. To quote the book's glum goldfish: “No, I do not like it/Not one little bit.”

Directed by Erica Rivinoja and Alessandro Carloni, who also wrote the screenplay, “The Cat in the Hat” is what happens when lots and lots of money gets thrown at a movie with middling returns. (We're talking Taylor Swift cash, courtesy of using her “Shake It Off.”)

At least it distances itself from the live-action approach of the underperforming and creepy 2003 film starring Mike Myers, instead using stylized and varied computer animation. Bill Hader now voices the Cat, with his trademark sarcastic, demented and oily approach. The Cat is portrayed with teeth, though, and that's unsettling.

We meet the Cat after he's bombed his latest assignment. It turns out he works for a gleaming corporate conglomerate that sends out envoys to cheer up kids at their homes. There's even a human resources department and white-collar cubicles — our anarchic Cat as office drone.

Missions here are evaluated on two measures: A hopeful uptick in clients' happiness and the level of destruction left behind. The Cat is good at thing one, but bad at thing two. He faces being fired unless he succeeds at his next task — cheering up two depressed kids whose single mom recently moved them to the city.

When he appears, he's quickly pepper-sprayed by the oldest, Gabby, a marching band nerd with huge glasses and a “creative, artistic soul.” She thinks it's a home invasion and wants to call the cops. This reaction is not canon.

The Cat has to convince Gabby and her younger brother, Sebastian, to have fun, and if there's any damage, he's stolen a device from office supplies — a clocklike “gobacker” — that can undo the past. They soon lose it. “I can't believe this and I'm a talking cat,” says our hero.

Now things click into operatic levels, with a mysterious nefarious creature with gleaming eyes — a cross between a massive bat and a toothy pterodactyl — that is also hunting the device. If it finds it, the “fabric of the universe will be distorted forever.” Yeesh. What happened to: “I know it is wet and the sun is not sunny, but we can have lots of good fun that is funny?”

The goldfish is here — Matt Berry, hijacking the movie — as an English-accented, pseudo-Shakespearean actor-y type fish named Waffles. Waffles? And there are Things galore — during the climactic battle scene — yes, there's a battle scene — there must be thousands of Things. But not one rhyme, a shame.

The animation is handled wonderfully, with three distinct styles for different worlds. (As the book would say: “My tricks are not bad.”) And the voices are perfectly cast: Giancarlo Esposito as Cat's evil boss, Bowen Yang as an intern and Paula Pell as a landlady all stand out.

The messaging is muddled. One is that you should always stand up for a friend. Another is that your parents were, shockingly, once cool. A third is that home is wherever you want it to be. And fourth is making a mess is the best part of childhood.

Making a mess of “The Cat in the Hat” didn't have to happen. It didn't have to have a possible rip in the time-space continuum. It didn't have to flood the zone with Things. And it doesn't need a sequel, please.

“The Cat in the Hat,” a Warner Bros. Pictures Animation release that lands in theaters Friday, is rated PG by the Motion Picture Association for “action, some peril, mild language and rude humor.” Running time: 107 minutes. One and a half stars out of four.

Bill Hader arrives at the LA Premiere of "The Cat in the Hat" on Sunday, Oct. 25, 2026, at the Warner Bros. Studios in Burbank, Calif. (Photo by Richard Shotwell/Invision/AP)

Bill Hader arrives at the LA Premiere of "The Cat in the Hat" on Sunday, Oct. 25, 2026, at the Warner Bros. Studios in Burbank, Calif. (Photo by Richard Shotwell/Invision/AP)

Xochitl Gomez, from left, Quinta Brunson and America Ferrera arrive at the LA Premiere of "The Cat in the Hat" on Sunday, Oct. 25, 2026, at the Warner Bros. Studios in Burbank, Calif. (Photo by Richard Shotwell/Invision/AP)

Xochitl Gomez, from left, Quinta Brunson and America Ferrera arrive at the LA Premiere of "The Cat in the Hat" on Sunday, Oct. 25, 2026, at the Warner Bros. Studios in Burbank, Calif. (Photo by Richard Shotwell/Invision/AP)

Americans head to the polls Tuesday in midterm elections that will determine control of Congress. Democrats are seeking to win the House and Senate, which would give them greater power to challenge President Donald Trump’s agenda after two years of Republican control.

A person votes at a polling precinct at the Household of Faith Church on Election Day Tuesday, Nov. 3, 2026, in New Orleans. (AP Photo/Gerald Herbert)

A person votes at a polling precinct at the Household of Faith Church on Election Day Tuesday, Nov. 3, 2026, in New Orleans. (AP Photo/Gerald Herbert)

Ballots are counted at the Los Angeles County Ballot Processing Center on Tuesday, Nov. 3, 2026, in City of Industry, Calif.(AP Photo/William Liang)

Ballots are counted at the Los Angeles County Ballot Processing Center on Tuesday, Nov. 3, 2026, in City of Industry, Calif.(AP Photo/William Liang)

Samantha Pounder, of Washington, confirms her address with a poll worker while voting with her daughters Aya, 3, left, and Sade, 6, at the Emery Heights Community Center, Tuesday Nov. 3, 2026, during the midterm elections in Washington. (AP Photo/Jacquelyn Martin)

Samantha Pounder, of Washington, confirms her address with a poll worker while voting with her daughters Aya, 3, left, and Sade, 6, at the Emery Heights Community Center, Tuesday Nov. 3, 2026, during the midterm elections in Washington. (AP Photo/Jacquelyn Martin)

A person peers through a hole in a fence at a polling station on Skid Row on Tuesday, Nov. 3, 2026, in Los Angeles.(AP Photo/Jae C. Hong)

A person peers through a hole in a fence at a polling station on Skid Row on Tuesday, Nov. 3, 2026, in Los Angeles.(AP Photo/Jae C. Hong)

Voters wait in line to cast their ballots at a polling place at Central Bucks South High School on Election Day in Warrington, Pa., Tuesday, Nov. 3, 2026. (AP Photo/Matt Rourke)

Voters wait in line to cast their ballots at a polling place at Central Bucks South High School on Election Day in Warrington, Pa., Tuesday, Nov. 3, 2026. (AP Photo/Matt Rourke)

Voters cast their ballots at the Church of the Heavenly Rest in New York on Election Day, Tuesday, Nov. 3, 2026. (AP Photo/Yuki Iwamura)

Voters cast their ballots at the Church of the Heavenly Rest in New York on Election Day, Tuesday, Nov. 3, 2026. (AP Photo/Yuki Iwamura)

A child peers from under a voting booth at a polling precinct at the NORD Milne Center on Election Day Tuesday, Nov. 3, 2026, in New Orleans. (AP Photo/Gerald Herbert)

A child peers from under a voting booth at a polling precinct at the NORD Milne Center on Election Day Tuesday, Nov. 3, 2026, in New Orleans. (AP Photo/Gerald Herbert)

A man casts his ballot at a polling station on Skid Row on Tuesday, Nov. 3, 2026, in Los Angeles.(AP Photo/Jae C. Hong)

A man casts his ballot at a polling station on Skid Row on Tuesday, Nov. 3, 2026, in Los Angeles.(AP Photo/Jae C. Hong)

A Kalshi ad encouraging pedestrians to dispose their cigarettes based on who they think will win the Alaska Senate race is pictured on Capitol Hill on Election Day, Tuesday, Nov. 3, 2026, in Washington. (AP Photo/Allison Robbert)

A Kalshi ad encouraging pedestrians to dispose their cigarettes based on who they think will win the Alaska Senate race is pictured on Capitol Hill on Election Day, Tuesday, Nov. 3, 2026, in Washington. (AP Photo/Allison Robbert)

Kathryn Schoemann votes at a 148-year-old former one-room school house Tuesday, Nov. 3, 2026, near Perry, Kan. (AP Photo/Charlie Riedel)

Kathryn Schoemann votes at a 148-year-old former one-room school house Tuesday, Nov. 3, 2026, near Perry, Kan. (AP Photo/Charlie Riedel)

A voter enters a polling place located inside a church in Homestead, Fla., on Election Day, Tuesday, Nov. 3, 2026. (AP Photo/Rebecca Blackwell)

A voter enters a polling place located inside a church in Homestead, Fla., on Election Day, Tuesday, Nov. 3, 2026. (AP Photo/Rebecca Blackwell)

Samantha Pounder, of Washington, confirms her address with a poll worker while voting with her daughters Aya, 3, left, and Sade, 6, at the Emery Heights Community Center, Tuesday Nov. 3, 2026, during the midterm elections in Washington. (AP Photo/Jacquelyn Martin)

Samantha Pounder, of Washington, confirms her address with a poll worker while voting with her daughters Aya, 3, left, and Sade, 6, at the Emery Heights Community Center, Tuesday Nov. 3, 2026, during the midterm elections in Washington. (AP Photo/Jacquelyn Martin)

Students commute past a 'VOTE!' mural on Election Day near the University of Texas campus in Austin, Texas, Tuesday, Nov. 3, 2026. (AP Photo/Eric Gay)

Students commute past a 'VOTE!' mural on Election Day near the University of Texas campus in Austin, Texas, Tuesday, Nov. 3, 2026. (AP Photo/Eric Gay)

Voters wait to vote Tuesday, Nov. 3, 2026, in South Portland, Maine. (AP Photo/Robert F. Bukaty)

Voters wait to vote Tuesday, Nov. 3, 2026, in South Portland, Maine. (AP Photo/Robert F. Bukaty)

With free rides for Election Day, Austin metro buses use their banner to encourage voting in Austin, Texas, Tuesday, Nov. 3, 2026. (AP Photo/Eric Gay)

With free rides for Election Day, Austin metro buses use their banner to encourage voting in Austin, Texas, Tuesday, Nov. 3, 2026. (AP Photo/Eric Gay)

Voters wait in line before casting their ballots at the First Church of the Open Bible on Election Day, Tuesday, Nov. 3, 2026, in Des Moines, Iowa. (AP Photo/Charlie Neibergall)

Voters wait in line before casting their ballots at the First Church of the Open Bible on Election Day, Tuesday, Nov. 3, 2026, in Des Moines, Iowa. (AP Photo/Charlie Neibergall)

Voters cast their ballots at the First Church of the Open Bible on Election Day, Tuesday, Nov. 3, 2026, in Des Moines, Iowa. (AP Photo/Charlie Neibergall)

Voters cast their ballots at the First Church of the Open Bible on Election Day, Tuesday, Nov. 3, 2026, in Des Moines, Iowa. (AP Photo/Charlie Neibergall)

Steve Simpson, who is part of group dedicated to spreading compassion, wears an eagle costume to attract attention as he reminds citizens to vote on Election Day, Tuesday, Nov. 3, 2026, in Portland, Maine. (AP Photo/Robert F. Bukaty)

Steve Simpson, who is part of group dedicated to spreading compassion, wears an eagle costume to attract attention as he reminds citizens to vote on Election Day, Tuesday, Nov. 3, 2026, in Portland, Maine. (AP Photo/Robert F. Bukaty)

A volunteer sorts "I Voted" stickers at the Brooklyn Museum in New York on Election Day, Tuesday, Nov. 3, 2026. (AP Photo/Yuki Iwamura)

A volunteer sorts "I Voted" stickers at the Brooklyn Museum in New York on Election Day, Tuesday, Nov. 3, 2026. (AP Photo/Yuki Iwamura)

The sun rises behind the U.S. Capitol, as seen reflected in the U.S. Capitol Reflecting Pool, on Election Day, Tuesday, Nov. 3, 2026, in Washington. (AP Photo/Allison Robbert)

The sun rises behind the U.S. Capitol, as seen reflected in the U.S. Capitol Reflecting Pool, on Election Day, Tuesday, Nov. 3, 2026, in Washington. (AP Photo/Allison Robbert)

Voters mark their ballots at a polling place at the Katherine Johnson Global Academy in Baltimore, Tuesday, Nov. 3, 2026. (AP Photo/Stephanie Scarbrough)

Voters mark their ballots at a polling place at the Katherine Johnson Global Academy in Baltimore, Tuesday, Nov. 3, 2026. (AP Photo/Stephanie Scarbrough)

Signs focusing on affordability and encouraging people to vote are posted on a bridge on Peace Street in Raleigh, N.C., on Election Day, Tuesday, Nov. 3, 2026. (AP Photo/Matt Ramey)

Signs focusing on affordability and encouraging people to vote are posted on a bridge on Peace Street in Raleigh, N.C., on Election Day, Tuesday, Nov. 3, 2026. (AP Photo/Matt Ramey)

A voter laughs while placing an "I voted" sticker on their chest after casting their ballot at a polling place at the Katherine Johnson Global Academy in Baltimore, Tuesday, Nov. 3, 2026. (AP Photo/Stephanie Scarbrough)

A voter laughs while placing an "I voted" sticker on their chest after casting their ballot at a polling place at the Katherine Johnson Global Academy in Baltimore, Tuesday, Nov. 3, 2026. (AP Photo/Stephanie Scarbrough)

Voters wait in line to cast their ballots at a polling place at Central Bucks South High School on Election Day in Warrington, Pa., Tuesday, Nov. 3, 2026. (AP Photo/Matt Rourke)

Voters wait in line to cast their ballots at a polling place at Central Bucks South High School on Election Day in Warrington, Pa., Tuesday, Nov. 3, 2026. (AP Photo/Matt Rourke)

A voter carries their ballot at the Brooklyn Museum in New York on Election Day, Tuesday, Nov. 3, 2026. (AP Photo/Yuki Iwamura)

A voter carries their ballot at the Brooklyn Museum in New York on Election Day, Tuesday, Nov. 3, 2026. (AP Photo/Yuki Iwamura)

A volunteer places a "Vote Here" sign at the Brooklyn Museum in New York on Election Day, Tuesday, Nov. 3, 2026. (AP Photo/Yuki Iwamura)

A volunteer places a "Vote Here" sign at the Brooklyn Museum in New York on Election Day, Tuesday, Nov. 3, 2026. (AP Photo/Yuki Iwamura)

Voters wait in line to cast their ballots at a polling place at Central Bucks South High School on Election Day in Warrington, Pa., Tuesday, Nov. 3, 2026. (AP Photo/Matt Rourke)

Voters wait in line to cast their ballots at a polling place at Central Bucks South High School on Election Day in Warrington, Pa., Tuesday, Nov. 3, 2026. (AP Photo/Matt Rourke)

Voters arrive to cast their ballots at the Washington Township House polling place during the midterm election in Oregonia, Ohio, early Tuesday, Nov. 3, 2026. (AP Photo/Carolyn Kaster)

Voters arrive to cast their ballots at the Washington Township House polling place during the midterm election in Oregonia, Ohio, early Tuesday, Nov. 3, 2026. (AP Photo/Carolyn Kaster)

People cast their ballots at a polling location open for early voting at the Curtis D. Menard Memorial Sports Center, Sunday, Nov. 1, 2026, in Wasilla, Alaska. (AP Photo/Lindsey Wasson)

People cast their ballots at a polling location open for early voting at the Curtis D. Menard Memorial Sports Center, Sunday, Nov. 1, 2026, in Wasilla, Alaska. (AP Photo/Lindsey Wasson)

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